Sometime this year,  we taxpayers will again receive another ‘Economic Stimulus’ payment. This is in deed a very exciting program,  and I’ll explain it by

Using a Q & A format:

Q.  What is an ‘Economic Stimulus’ payment ?
A.  It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.
 

Q.  Where will the government get this money ?
A.  From taxpayers.

Q.  So the government is giving me back my own money ?
A.  Only a smidgen of it.

Q.  What is the purpose of this payment ?
A.  The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a High-definition TV set,  thus stimulating the economy.

Q.  But isn’t that stimulating the economy of China ?
A.  Shut up.

Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U.S. Economy by spending your stimulus check wisely:        
       *  If you spend the stimulus money at Wal-Mart,  the money will Go to China or Sri Lanka .
       *  If you spend it on gasoline,  your money will go to the Arabs or South Americans.
       *  If you purchase a computer,  it will go to India , Taiwan or China .  
       *  If you purchase fruit and vegetables,  it will go to Mexico , Honduras and Guatemala .
       *  If you buy an efficient  car,  it will go to Japan or Korea .
       *  If you pay your credit cards off, or buy stock,  it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.

   Instead,  keep the money in America by:
   1)  Spending it at yard sales      
   2)  Going to ball games    
   3)  Spending it on prostitutes      
   4)  Beer      
   5) Tattoos.
   (These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S. )
 

Conclusion:
   Go to a ball game with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day !

No need to thank me,  I’m just glad I could be of help.